Where to look for love – top 4 online dating sites

Which Online Dating Site Did You Use?

Whenever I give a talk and share my story about finding the love of my life at 59, the first question is always, “How did you meet him?” “We met online.” I say… and of course the next question is “Which online dating site did you use?”

While there are a lot of variables in online dating sites beside the site itself – your experience may vary depending on your geography, age range and preferences – but for most of us there’s some pretty standard criteria that puts one online dating site about the rest.

I’ve shared my personal views on dating sites and how to optimize your results in my online dating profile training, but I was pleased to find an independent review of 68 dating sites that took a scientific approach. The report rated the dating sites along eight distinct criteria, including: active user base, ease of use, sophistication of the algorithms behind the match, and the ability of users to make meaningful connections.

The Bottom line?

1. Best Overall – OkCupid: “Two factors really set OkCupid apart from the competition: It produces the best profiles, and it uses the best matching algorithm.  Like many other dating sites, OkCupid algorithmically compares your answers to those of other users to determine if you’re compatible. But unlike most dating sites, it (a) lets you choose the answer you want your partner to give, and (b) lets you rank how important the question is to you. OkCupid uses your answers to these questions to do a bunch of math, so that whenever you look at another user’s profile, you see a “match percentage” (which measures ways you’re compatible with someone) and an “enemy percentage” (which measures ways you’re not compatible with someone). Though OkCupid emphasizes high match percentages, it’s just as important to have a low enemy percentage.” More…
2. Best for Long-Term Relationships – Match.com: “Match.com was the first real dating website, and it’s still among the best. It has a reputation as a better place to search for long-term relationships than the more hookup-friendly OkCupid, and science backs that reputation up: According to one study, Match.com and eHarmony produce the most marriages of any dating sites or apps. It’s free to build a profile, but you have to pay to use the site effectively; if you’re not a subscriber, you can’t do even basic things like read your messages. Luckily, it’s affordable: $31/month for 3 months, $27/month for 6 months, $25/month for 12 months. (Though, again, look for the deals and discounts the site will advertise to you when you’re using the free version.)” More…
3. Most Underwhelming – eHarmony: “Our experience on eHarmony was mostly negative. The design is buggy on both the website and the app, which makes it harder to use. For our tester, the matching algorithm was completely ineffective — she didn’t find a single interesting prospect — and we got way fewer views (7!) and messages (4) than on any other site. The site regularly told our tester that someone was a “great match,” even if the only thing they had in common was that they didn’t smoke, or in some cases, even if the other user’s profile was blank. That was extra disappointing considering how much money the site cost.” More…
4. Most Overwhelming – Plenty Of Fish: “Plenty of Fish is difficult to use, not too pretty to look at, and frankly overwhelming, at least if you’re a straight woman. We got way, way, way more activity than on any other site: a total of 1,461 views and 114 messages. This would be a good thing — more potential matches, more choices — except that most of the interactions were extremely low quality. Only 5 of those 114 messages were good. Twenty-six were mediocre, and 83 were bad. Many times, we weren’t sure if the messages we were receiving were from a real human or a spambot, because they just said “hey” or something similar. Clicking through to the sender’s profile didn’t help; most people don’t spend very much time filling out their profile on POF, and it was hard to tell if something like “……..” was written by a scammer who didn’t want to invest too much time in a fake profile or a guy genuinely looking to date who just got bored while filling out his info.” More…

I trust this study as it matched my own experience from a couple of years ago… After trying them all …. eHarmony, OkCupid, Match, POF, Tinder, Our Time, Elite Singles, etc… I narrowed my choices down to OkCupid and Match. But, “your experience may vary” as they say.

So be bold. Experiment. Learn what works and what doesn’t, but do pay attention to the math. There’s something in them there algorithms… make them work for you. Before you venture online, make sure you have a rockin’ fabulous online dating profile to go with that great online dating site…

“Good online dating profiles are both extremely important and surprisingly hard to find.” Dolor says, “When online dating, people skim through profiles, so it’s important to stand out in the crowd. Avoid being generic with clichés like ‘live, laugh, love’ or ‘I like to laugh and have fun.’”

Have you found love online? Share your dating story by posting in the comments below.